It has been really interesting to see the people in my life that truly support me. This has been quite the process and I’m still in the middle of it… All that to say, I’m so blown away by the people that care about me, those that I’ve known for a good portion of my life that are able to leave a comment or send a text that just lets me know that they care about what is happening in my life that even though I’m a thousand miles from home, I’m not doing life alone.
Last night I met a girl at the small group I’ve gotten connected to and she was willing to vouch for me at her job to help me try and find a place at her company. Something about that level of trust and instant friendship that we’re united with Christ that we would stick our neck out for someone that we don’t even know. maybe it was my quick wit last night and she thought I was funny (i’m finally feeling comfortable with the group). Whatever it was I’m so thankful for her willingness to even step out and say something to me, we’ll see what happens!
The support in my life near and far, it unbelievable. I feel like it has even brought be closer to my brother and sister, they’ll both randomly text me that see how I’m doing and how they can help me out. I actually feel like a little sister again and they are doing all they can to take care of me. I thought that this adventure would be more of the opposite, that going away would show more independence, less help needed. The opposite has proven to be true. I love the people that I have in my life now more than before.
Before I go, here is another picture of a project that Morgin and I have worked on the last couple of days, it’s not quite done, but wanted to share anyways. Be Grateful.
I think it is safe to say that I have the days where I feel like nothing will ever change and I’m ready to give up and just load my car up and drive home while I still have enough room on my credit card to pay for gas… BUT then I remind myself that I’m here for a reason.
No one wants to have to be in a place of complete trust, complete dependence, complete necessity for God to do a miracle. Trust me, you don’t want to be there (here). I’m continually being taught obedience. It takes courage and faith. I’m not one to toot my own horn and that’s not what I’m intending to do, but rather realize that in the midst of hard times, it’s ok to have doubts, it’s ok to have a rough day with a few tears being shed. Those days will come even if everything is going well.
I have gone to a Bible Study a few times now with a group of young women, it has been refreshing. It’s different being the one that everyone is trying to get to know, I’m really not used to being in this place (feels like 20 questions). They all know each other and Morgin and I are trying to fit into the group, but at least they are trying to get to know us! They are great and it is interesting to see their views of the Bible without any background of who they are (for the most part). We’ve been going to through Genesis, chapter-by-chapter and really digging deep into each one. This last week one of the ladies brought up a really interesting fact. We’re in the middle of the story of Noah and she mentions first how evil the world must have been for God to wipe it out, and that’s usually what I think about, how bad was it? ‘Cause it seems pretty bad now. She went on to say that just proves how powerful the blood of Jesus really is. I have never thought of that. His death and blood are powerful enough to cover the multitude of sin that we now live in the midst of – and I’m covered by it.
It was just a really powerful thought, and He is the one that is caring for me now. He knows what I’m going through, and He is powerful enough. After spending a good portion of Thursday night awake, praying, thinking, tossing and turning, I woke up Friday morning and got a phone call asking me to come in for an interview. Obviously nothing is certain even yet, but it is a step in the right direction. So, Tuesday at 4pm I’ll be interviewing for a personal/admin assistant job in Pasadena. I’d love your prayers. This journey continues to amaze me as I see how blessed I am and how many people I really do have rooting for me in this adventure. So many are willing to talk to friends/family and help in anyway that they can. Thank you for being such a group of encouraging and uplifting people.
I leave you with this, a shot I took last weekend when I got to spend some time at the beach (gotta have a few perks, right?)
Well, I have to be honest – I just had to count the weeks that I’ve been here. It has been six-weeks, hard to believe. I was just laying in bed trying to figure out what is going on with my life. This is not where I expected to be… not at all. Then again, if I would have known, I probably wouldn’t have taken the leap of faith that I did. There have been so many questions floating around in my head.
I am where I’m supposed to be?
Is this really what God had in mind?
Am I going to be ok?
Am I close yet?
And still the small soft voice kept answering all my questions… yes. I know that should bring me such peace, after all I’m supposed to walk in that peace each day as I go into battle. Have I been preparing for battle in the ways that I should be? I don’t think I’ve been putting my shoes on.
I have confidence in who my God is and I know that he holds my life in His hands, it just requires me to surrender to Him and loosen the grip that I have on my life. It’s not mine anymore, it never really has been, I’ve just been pretending that I had it. I’m holding onto the hope that He gives me in His Word and in His promises. Why would He ask me to be where I am if it wasn’t for something great? Who am I to do something great? Not really anyone, but apparently He uses those that are willing, so here I am at 12:33am, willing. Waiting. Hoping.
Maybe now I can get some sleep…
Well, now that November is here I found that I have lived through so many emotions that have been overwhelming me. I came down here with so much fervor and strength that I knew God would provide. I still believe that whole heartedly as my saving dwindle and I’m wondering where next month’s rent is going to come from. I have been doing my due diligence in applying for multiple jobs everyday, but still nothing has come up. I haven’t felt that stirring that I was finding something that spoke to the soul of who I am. I know for a fact that God didn’t just call me down here to get a part-time job at a retail place and barely ekkk by every month.
With God as my provider, I have to trust him. One of my roommates found a job today that is at Azusa Pacific University that I think would be perfect for me. With my years of experience at the church doing media and serving in that capacity, I believe that I am who they need. Most jobs I just apply and hope for the best, but this one stirs something in me. I am praying that this will be the one that I’ve been looking for. The waiting has been hard, but I’ve known all along that He had something special out there for me, I praying that this is it. Even if it isn’t, I feel like I have renewed that fervor and passion that I came here with. That God has my back and isn’t going to leave me hanging, He has called me to this adventure and I’m going to live it out to the fullest! Waiting is hard and takes a lot of courage, but I’m willing to wait if it means finding the right job that I can excel at! I’ll keep you up to date with what happens!